Hello 2012

Saturday, December 31, 2011

So..as I usually do this every year..HELLO 2012!

First blog post to kick things off.

I'm gonna stay faithful to this already dead website called Blogger.

Do people even blog here anymore?

K anyways, I've been reading my whole year's blog entries, and I must say I love it! Was beaming throughout it. But I'm gonna try to reduce the sad entries. Last year PMS-es were really horrible. Hopefully, I'll gain better control of myself this year.

Still getting used to the 'this year, last year' thing. It's just been a day..adjustments are necessary.

Erm, so yeah. I don't really believe in resolutions, but I guess it's good to have them, just to have an aim of what you're gonna do in your life. So here's mine:

-To be a better Muslim. stop skipping prayers. and have better iman.

-Earn some moolahs and save up during internship.

-Go to freaking London by the end of the year.

-I hope for this every year: To see Jonas, or Miley

-And adding to that, One Direction and Coldplay

-Make things work

-To be happy

-To stop talking bad of people. Benefit of the Doubt.

To just be a better person basically.

The new year just means a year closer to death, to Kiamat. So why are we, instead of moving closer to God, slowly fading away? It's time to wake up people. The world's not gonna be here forever. I'm not saying that because it's 2012 and stuff. I really mean it, each day passing is a day to our non-existence. You gotta think that life can't just end just like that, and there's an Afterlife we have to work on as well. So stop taking life so seriously, work hard yeah, but don't be so greedy and openly share your knowledge. This is something I have to keep in mind myself.

Ask yourself: Are you ready?

Goodbye 2011:)

Saturday, December 31, 2011

2011 had indeed passed us by like a jetplane dashing through the sky.

I'm thankful that my year had been super great. I'm at the happiest I can be, Alhamdulillah for that. Now, I can only look back and smile at all I have done with the help of the Almighty.

I start out the year, in Year 1 Sem 2 rushing through final assessments and common tests trying to finish up my first year:

I had a BCOMM Oral presentation, which might I say, I did well seeing how I'm bad at it. The important thing was that I was proud of how I've performed.
Then I had the Jumpstart Challenge. It was indeed a fun challenge, rushing through time and cracking our brains but again, I was proud of our end result.

Then for Silat, we had an STA friendly. It was the first time fighting outside the school venue, first time really fighting someone:

And even though I lost the match, I was proud of myself for giving my all. That became my motivation to work harder.
Then we had the in-camp training. To be honest, I was scared shitless for the camp. But I was glad that I survived it, even though half the time I felt like puking and was pissed at my poor performance. But I gained more confidence through it.
And finally, the IVP. First competition. First fight with a stranger. First sport that I've ever done. First competition going in solo. First junior to fight first. I WAS FREAKING OUT. I remembered the whole week, my mind was just full of kicks and punches. But my nerves got the best of me, and I panicked. It was an easy fight, but I lost. I was not satisfied with my performance and my mentality at that moment, and it affected me a lot throughout the year.

Then I attended Hanis and Nadiah's Ali Baba musical. The first time seeing them perform, and they were amazing.

Then the next big event of my life: 30 HOUR FAMINE CAMP

I joined as a Game Warrior. Best experience ever. It has its downlows, but let us just look at the good times. The game, to see all these participants, the new friends I made, the crack-ups we had. It was awesome.

The biggest event that happened in 2011, is obviously: YEP Cambodia

I volunteered to be the t-shirt designer. It didn't go well, and I'm not that proud of the end product, but I love the shirt. From the first meeting, to the bonding camp, to the real thing, to the barbeque after that, it was truly an awesome period of mine. I met so many nice people, and made so many friends. Radeth, Markos(hehe!), Anna, Liyana, the three musketeers Din, Sebastian and ZiFeng and Wen Yue and my phnompenh team. SO many good memories! I can go on and on about this life-changing trip, and I will never get bored of it. But too bad people would. I saw my results there, and I received my first A ever in poly, and got a hug from my FMGT teacher, which was great.

AND THEN: HARRY POTTER PART 2 PREMIERE

CAN I SAY, BEST FRANCHISE EVER? I've grown up with this, and as I watched the London premiere live with all the stars coming in and giving their speeches, I was filled with goosebumps, and I teared. Yes I teared.

And then SPOPS happened. I play a very little part in this. But, NPSilat One Team. I was proud of the team, it really felt like we won first place even though we didn't. And with the juniors playing a BIG part in this, and all the newbies doing so extremely well, it just made me feel extremely lucky to be in such a wonderful team.

Then of course, I hit the BIG 18:

It was definitely not the best day I had. BUT the celebration was great. My birthday landed on Hari Raya, so we had fireworks with my siblings which was great. And the surprise from the girls Hanis, Asnira, Nadiah and Ellis was the best surprise ever. AND THE BEST GIFT EVER. 18 gifts in a big box, I will never forget how I had to walk through customs with that! :D

It was a GREAT year for my favourite celebrities too:

Even though Jonas kinda died down this year, they still rocks in my heart. They had their tour, their best and last performance together at the Concert For Hope.
Joe Jonas released FASTLIFE! Which I bought:P
Demi Lovato had an album, which I have!
Coldplay had a new album, Mylo Xyloto, which I bought!
And my favourite boyband from XFactor, ONE DIRECTION, rose to fame! Got their album woohoo! Gotta thank Whatthebuck for introducing me to XFactor, without which I would never have known about these boys till much much later, then I wouldn't even be a fan because of the craze they have now.

And my year wouldn't be as great without the people in it:

My awesome Riverside peeps, without which I would be so so bored with my life. The great outings we always have, even if it was just a picnic or a dinner, was the best moments of my life.

My beautiful NPSilat team, without which I wouldn't be having lots of friends in school, and wouldn't have belonged in NP. I wouldn't have met my fellow Arsenal fans, and directioners.

My hilarious classmates, without which classes would be horrible and boring. The laughter and crapness we went through in empty classrooms and what-nots was the best.

So it had indeed been a GREAT 2011. I thank God for making my year so successful and filled with happiness.
Let's just pray that 2012 would be the same, if not better, year for me. InsyaAllah:)

NPSilat Goodbyes

Monday, December 19, 2011

It didn't really hit me till the last day of the came that the Year 3s are gonna be leaving us soon.

I've gotten so used to the idea of them around us always, that sometimes I forgot that we all only have 3 years in school and that this year was their last.

I'm gonna miss them all so much. It's not gonna be the same, that's for sure.

I'm not really close with any year 3s except for Berliana, but each individual Year 3 have made a BIG impact on our lives. They're my inspiration for training harder, they were the first friends I have in poly, they patiently guided us noob girls without any prior training.

They're the ones who believed in us, when we ourselves didn't believe in ourselves. They supported us and never once lost hope on us, even though we weren't as great. For all the belief in us, I thank you because without it, we won't be as strong as we are now.

For all the jokes and laughter you guys made, thank you. Because you opened your hearts to us so easily, and made us all so easily connected with you guys, you are the greatest seniors we'll ever have.

For all the effort to keep us going, I thank you because it must be so hard to manage and look after one whole team. But you guys are so committed that you hardly complained.

We will miss your presence during trainings, and I hope you will come down as much as possible because we need you guys. There's a special little place in our hearts just for NPSilat, and you guys are definitely definitely a big part of it.

Sometimes I wonder how we'll be without you, when it's our time to step up and become seniors ourselves. But NPSilat is ONE TEAM. And we will never fall apart no matter what, and that's a promise.

After all, "What's life without NPSilat?"

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Kk..quick update:

First paper was just now. Stayed up till 3 to study it cos I hadn't started studying a single thing. Was so busy with the long report assg, and coming back home at 1am every day last week was just tiring. But I pulled through, and I think I'm gonna do quite well for the paper. Well, at least I think I can pass it. I'm sure I made quite a few careless mistakes here and there, and I tikam a lot also.

SO next paper on Thurs and Friday, which means I have 4 days to study.

Not so confident for COST but Tax is my forte hehe..I have the confidence for tax lah, just need to make sure it's not complacency.

So erm, very tired last week. Gonna have another tiring week. Holidays are not really holidays, what with the 2 project submissions.

And this is gonna be my last long school break, cos I have no semester break yay-.-

I am not looking forward to internship.

10 things I hate about you. And you. And you.

Friday, December 02, 2011

I hate the way you make me feel

like I'm such a waste of space.

Like I'm just a girl you would rather kill

than someone you would embrace.

I hate the fact you always look down on me

Because I know I've done nothing right.

The way you always look at me

As if you just hate it when I'm in sight.

I hate the way you shut me off

Ever so rudely, with the fake yawns and snores.

I know how I talk and that it's rough

To hear me out with my stories which bores.

I hate your eyes

Because they always makes me feel stupid.

You told me lies but pretend you're so nice
And I wish you would have stop it.

I hate how you think I'm no good at all

How I always screw things up for you

I have to smile and act like I'm having a ball

Just so I don't cry in front of you.

I hate how you talked about me behind my back

How you think I wouldn't know.

But you don't know that I could hear my heart crack

When I overheard you talking of me so low.

I hate how you think my life is all perfect

That you never even bother to ask

Don't you know how much it hurts me so,

to hide myself in this mask?

I hate how you expect so much of me
And think that you know me at all
But I'm tired and I'm lonely
And I hate being treated so small.

I hate how you don't show me any love
When all I want is to know you care
If only you know how seeing you love someone else gets on my nerve
But all I can do is stop and stare.

I hate how you're always so unsatisfied with me
How you talked bad about me to others
I love myself but you're not making it easy
And a broken heart is so hard to nurse.

Am I even a big part of your life?

Will you even miss me when I'm here?

I hate the fact I've to ask myself that question

And that thinking of you always make me tear.

1 December 2011.

Thursday, December 01, 2011

The countdown begins.

1 December was not really a good one.

But it was really just because of the stupid assessment.

We wasted so much opportunities to score, and in the end we were penalised quite heavily.

But the day was actually a good one.

Saw Mat Tuck after 2 weeks, cos I missed the shuttle bus on Tuesday-.-

So awkward, cos I was wearing my formal attire.

I swear he was staring like.. O.O

I'm not kidding, he took a double take when he saw me in the line. So I had to look away from him, cos I was looking at him too:P

In my head, I was just like 'Please don't look at me' even though I really want him to look at me.

But it's been a while since I wore high heels, and especially in school and those hills, it's just horrendous walking. I was doing so many faces cos I was losing balance and etc.

But he's kinda short huh. He walked beside me, and well you know..I added 2 inches to myself, whaddaya think?

Nvm, short is cute.

Lectures were okay. Accompanied Liyana to Helpdesk. She said the guy there cute..so not.

But it's been a while since I talked to her, so I shall put up with it.

The person I'm missing the most right now: Kames and Marcia.

So if you're reading this, I miss you!

Owe Marcia a birthday present! I don't know what to buy for you lahh.

K, goodnight.

It's 2 December now. I'm having lack of sleep this week and I'm tired.

But endurance.

End of hiatus.

Friday, November 18, 2011

Heyhey!

It's been so long since I last wrote here. I miss blogging. Like seriously, blogger you're the only one that gets me. LOL.

I've been busy with school. Didn't have much time with my laptop. Well, truthfully, it hasn't been that busy. I somehow managed to escape that route of stress that everyone seems to be having now.

So..November's ending soon. I plan on blogging my favourite moments of 2011 later next month to countdown the year 2012. But before that, quick update on my life. I haven't read through my blog yet so I can't remember what I've blogged and what I haven't. So here's just a quick update on the new school semester:

5 weeks have passed! Can you believe that? Wow, I can't. Time seems to move so fast.

And thankfully, Alhamdulillah, I think I'm a much better student this sem. So far, I've been listening to lectures, been doing all my tutorials, listening in tutorials. I've only ever been asleep for FIT lectures and tutorials. BUT not this week! Week 5, gotta remember that. I did not sleep in the lecture and tutorial in Week 5!

The best thing is that, because all my lectures are at the end of the week, and all my tutorials are squeezed into Tuesdays and Wednesdays, it kinda forced me to do my tutorials during the weekends. So I'm kinda studying straight after lectures. I guess that's why most of the content is still in my head. So now, after Wednesdays, I'm as free as a bird. While everyone's busy thinking of assignments and tutorials, I'm sleeping or watching my many many shows.

I mean, I'm sure that won't be the case in the next term when all the projects are piling up. But I must enjoy the freedom that I'm having right now, or else I'll regret it. Everyday I thank God that I've been very lucky so far.

And that brings me to my next point which is, I haven't been doing my prayers that much. Let me be clear in this: I AM NOT proud of this. AT ALL. I'm trying to better myself everyday. I think me blogging this might help put me in the right direction somehow? I don't know, just a try.

Oh and 6-months Internship next sem. Excited? Very nervous, I know that for sure. And career portfolio thingy..gosh. Got me thinking of what I'm good at or interested in. What should I showcase to my teacher? I'm no good at drawing. Maybe writing..am I good at writing?

I don't know what I'm doing. But I'm happy. Well I think I am. So I'm gonna stick with that for now.